- Ms. Mckracken, tell us-- - It's not Mckracken. It's Carol.
Mckracken is something I just use for legal stuff--
Divorce papers, bankruptcy notice, that sort of thing.
- And Carol is your maiden name. - No. My professional name
As in Christmas carol.
I manage the Deck the Halls store in Reseda,
spreading cheer throughout the year with the widest assortment
of Christmas decorations south of the North Pole.
Oh, and these are the spirits of Christmas.
Somebody have a little too much eggnog and crashed the sleigh?
No. We don't drink and drive.
We stroll and sing.
You're professional carolers.
We're all proud members of the screen actors guild,
on honorary withdrawal.
Deck the Halls keeps us in bread pudding year round
so that we can give the gift of live music for free.
That's what we were trying to do before our trip to Venice.
- Oh, your group performed in Italy? - California.
There we were in our red hats and scarves...
Singing a winter wonderland watching the sunset on the beach
when a tattooed man in blue approached and advised us
that we were in Crip territory.
Well, I happen to speak Crip, so I told him, "Chill. We were friendlies."
But then 5 men in blue approached
and asked if the red scarves meant that we were sent by the bloods to diss them.
I said fo-shizzle, we were just spreading the word
and please not get up in our grills.
Then I reached for my pitch-pipe--
- They beat the crap out of you. - Maybe they weren't music lovers.
How did you escape unhurt?
I took their advice and hauled my cracker ass out of there.
Ms. Carol, does your status at the screen actor's guild entitle you to
- accident insurance? - Oh, no.
That's why we're here.
We saw a notice on the Sag bulletin board
for the Hedda Grubman cosmetic surgery fund.
For all four surgeries?
In return for your services, we're prepared to render ours.
- You want to sing for your surgeries? - Not just sing.
"Deck the Halls". We will open our store room to you.
Mcnamara/Troy will be turned into a winter wonderland
with live music courtesy of "The Spirits."
Mrs. Grubman did love Christmas.
Transcript: swsub.com
Synchro: _/Yellow Sub\_
Synchro: Metalmarco ::ITA-SA::
Season 5 Episode 08 Duke Collins
Sean, really. What are we, 5?
Oh, come on. We've been doing secret Santa since college.
It's a holiday tradition.
So's mince meat, whatever the hell that is.
Well, I think it's sweet. I mean, it's nice to have some sort of a tradition,
especially when you celebrate Christmas every year
in a bathing suit and sunblock.
Think of it as a challenge
finding something original and meaningful for under $10.
Good. So, you won't mind another "pull my finger Santa?"
Look-- we haven't all been together on Christmas in a long time.
Maybe it is stupid, but I want to do it, OK?
I want to do the tree, the big turkey dinner.
If we can't take the time to celebrate being together as a family when we are,
we're going to regret it when we're not.
All right. Let's do it.
If you get your own name, we throw them all back
- and we try again. - Yes, yes.
Hello.
How bad?
Um, we're on our way.
Matt's in the hospital.
He's got second degree burns over 30 percent of his body,
mostly back and legs.
We had to wait for his vitals to stabilize in the ER
before transferring him over here.
Honey, can you hear me? Everything's going to be all right.
- Pulse is 160... - Hang in there, buddy.
- He'll need excision and grafting. - We'll do it.
Fine. We'll just prep him and check your privileges.
My God, I just don't understand how this could have happened.
Methamphetamine lab explosion. Excuse me.
- Meth lab explosion? - We thought he was clean.
- And you didn't tell me? - He told us it was over.
That he'd gotten help and had it under control.
He asked us to trust him, Julia.
We'll be back when we're finished.
He's lucky to be alive.
We have to focus on that.
I'm angry at him, too, you know?
How are you feeling, sweetie?
The surgery went well. We had to do some grafting.
We took some skin from your ass.
You know, the place where you keep your brains?
Thank you.
They said you were lucky.
That you could have been killed.
How could you do this to yourself? I just don't understand.
In the ambulance I heard them.
They didn't think I was going to make it.
And all I could think about was Jenna, about leaving my baby.
Don't give up on me, OK?
No one's giving up on you.
We're your family.
You'll be out in time for Christmas
- and we'll all be together. - No, we won't.
You're not invited.
Your promises are shit, man.
I'm done saving your ass. I'm done being sucked in by your lies,
your pathetic cries for help.
You know what it's like to be a parent-- peeling skin away
from the body of your own child?
The child you delivered with your own hands? I'm through!
Don't worry. He'll come around.
I'll talk to him.
The bullet entered at a strange angle.
Whoever did this must have been up pretty close.
He was sitting on my lap.
Oh, so this was a lover's quarrel.
What are you talking about?
It was a kid, 9 or 10 years old.
Sorry. I thought that--
Look, I needed some extra cash last Christmas, so I
took a gig playing Santa.
Merry christmas, Jacob.
I had a line a mile long.
The store was going to close in a half hour.
From the minute he climbed those steps, I knew something was wrong.
Thinking back, it was like he was on a mission or something.
I asked him what he wanted for Christmas.
Same as last year. Don't you remember?
Every christmas I give you a list--
a Nintendo, an iPod, a digital camera.
And every time you tell me you'll get me that stuff, if I'm good.
Yeah, right. Being good doesn't get you anything, does it?
You lying sack of Christmas shit.
They shot Santa!
Did they catch the kid?
Yeah. But I didn't press charges.
I mean, the kid's had it tough enough.
Why make it worse?
Well, that's very magnanimous of you, Mr. Collins.
I'm not sure many people would have responded quite that way.
We'd have to reopen the wound,
clean the scarring and damaged tissue,
and then create something called a "Limberg flap,"
which we'd rotate onto the enlarged hole.
I could schedule you for sometime after the--
No. I want it done now.
I want to be out in time to be Santa on Christmas eve.
Look, doc,
I've spent a year nervous around kids, you know?
It's like post-traumatic stress syndrome.
I've got to get back on the reindeer. I like kids.
I don't want to spend my life afraid of them,
have them afraid of me.
Mmm...I talked to Sean about Matt.
He'll come around.
This doesn't feel right-- Sneaking around.
That's why we should tell him. Just be honest about it.
I'm going to wait 'till after the holidays.
It was going to be hard enough this year
with everything going on with Matt.
It'd just be cruel.
What about Olivia? You have to tell her, too.
No. She has too much going on with Eden.
I want to wait 'till after the holidays. Please.
It's important to me.
Shit!
Jesus!
I thought you said he was in surgery all afternoon.
- Someone must have canceled. - Hello.
I'm not getting in that closet.
Christian. Christian?
What are you doing?
Just working out.
I always do this after I masturbate.
Make sure I hit all the muscle groups.
I thought we'd go get a tree together.
I found this great organic tree farm down on third.
They've got Douglas firs and
- Colorado blue spruce-- - Sean, Sean, Sean!
You don't expect me to work out in front of the mirror
and not want to whack off again.
You're sick.
You go by yourself.
I can take all night.
I need a lot of foreplay.
I'll wait. I'm not due back in surgery for a couple of hours.
- Can I get you some water or something? - Get him out of here.
I'm not good in small, dark spaces.
I feel like I'm in a sealed coffin.
Are you done?
You go, man. I just want to take a nap and cuddle.
Come on. Get up and let's go!
You go. I'm all snuggled up here.
It's pathetic picking out a tree by yourself.
We used to always do it together, the 3 of us, rember?
Yeah, I know, I know. That was 20 years ago.
Now we do things by ourselves, like, tie our shoelaces
and pick up trees.
Fine.
I'll call Julia. See if she'll come.
Why is her phone here?
I don't know. I guess I must have picked it out by mistake
when we played secret Santa.
All right. I'll go by myself.
If I hear one word about the size or shape.
I'm not one of your girlfriends, Sean.
That was fun. Let's never do that again.
Have you seen my other shoe?
There you go.
Where are you going?
Where I should have gone instead of coming here.
- To talk to Kimber. - You sure you'll come out alive?
I don't know, but I have to try.
I mean, the fact is,
if I can avoid hurting Sean and Olivia, I will.
But I'm not going to have my son wake up
and feel that everyone in his life has deserted him.
You know what? I'm coming with you.
Takes at least 2 to tango with Kimber,
preferably 8. One for each tentacle.
Go away!
Bah humbug.
Ebenezer Cruz, where's your Christmas spirit?
I love that our savior was born. I just hate the party we throw
and the music.
I mean, take a look at this guy.
Getting plugged by a 10-year-old because he didn't get a Nintendo.
People go broke, they eat too much,
spend it alone--
Come on, Liz. After all these years,
you still need an engraved invitation?
You're spending the day with us, just like you do every Christmas.
You, too, Linda.
Can't. I'm golfing.
It won't be the same without you.
We're having everybody over. Julia's coming.
And olivia.
I don't think I can make it either.
Are you still pissed about what happened with Julia?
I wish that I were a better person, Sean.
But maybe we both can learn a lesson in forgiveness from Santa.
So you think duke here did the right thing
by forgiving the kid that shot him.
That the punk's going to suddenly see the light and go straight?
What movie are you living in? "It's a wonderful life"?
Should have pressed charges and locked that kid up,
so no one else would wind up with a hole in their face.
It's about love, Sean.
It's about grace.
Mr. McNamara,
are you asleep?
You've been asleep the last 4 times I've come to visit.
5's my limit. I won't be back again.
Mr. McNamara, persons suffering
disfigurement from a traumatic event
have to learn how to recreate themselves,
to adapt to new body images.
Look,
lady, my dad's a plastic surgeon, ok?
I'm going to be fine, so try recreating someone else.
I don't usually force my services on unwilling patients.
The results are rarely successful.
However,
after reading your medical history,
I think you're definitely in need of some recreation.
You tested dirty for meth.
I'm Rachel Ben-Natan,
your burn rehabilitation counselor. I'm here to assist you.
How did it happen?
It was a falafel attack.
You know, those pita sandwiches?
I just had to have one.
So I went to
the university cafeteria,
I sat down
across the table from a very handsome boy.
I was quite beautiful.
I could always get anyone I wanted.
When he turned away,
I just assumed he was gay and went back to my falafel.
I was just about to take the first bite when he blew himself up.
7 students died.
There was blood and
body parts, and pieces of flesh everywhere.
I don't know how I survived. I was very lucky.
You think you were lucky?
Well, I've lost my taste for falafel, but I still have my life.
- Have you walked the hallways today? - No.
No. It still hurts.
It will hurt more if you don't.
What if I say no?
Try it and see.
I should warn you though, I spent 2 years in the israeli army.
And merry Christmas
to the biggest dick in town.
Keep it up, Danny boy.
How about that, uh?
All right, go on with your business. We'll have a little swinging.
So, who's the over-40 crowd?
No one. Just some ghosts from Christmas past.
Could stay close, 'cause I might need you.
Merry christmas, Julia.
- Would you like to hold baby Jenna? - Yeah. May I?
No. You may not.
Emily, take Jenna to daycare.
So I take it you 2 are Mattie's parents.
I promise you that your granddaughter will get everything that money can buy.
Great. So she can grow up to be just like her mommy.
I don't think we should hope for miracles, do you?
Wouldn't want to pressure the child.
Ram's going to marry me, and then
he's going to legally adopt Jenna once we both get divorced.
That's why we came, Kimber, because we thought you'd like to know
matt's had an accident. He's in the hospital
and he's been badly burned.
Making meth, right?
Well, thank god Jenna was with me.
You're not fit to be near that child, Kimber, and you know it.
What? You're a good mother, why? Because you went to college?
Or is it because you've never had to work a day in your life?
Because I was busy raising a family.
Yeah. You were lousy at it.
You robbed him of everything, Kimber. His identity, his money, his future.
You're not going to rob him of his child.
Don't you think that the little girl is going to be a little bit better off
with Kimber and me,
rather than some punk who is willing to be filmed taking it up the ass
so he can score a little bit more boo-yah?
That's my son, you dick-sucking pimp.
Didn't you guys know that Matt worked here?
Ram cast him in "First time fairies."
As a bottom.
Stop it, kimber. You're lying.
It's the only thing she's good at, except for spreading her legs.
Well, my daughter's going to have everything.
She's going to have designer clothes, gourmet food,
and 2 parents who love her.
What's matt going to give her? Drugs?
So stop trying to rescue my child when you can't save your own.
Could you please escort these grandparents out of here?
Merry Christmas.
Hi, Julia.
I made some fruitcake.
It's a recipe from one of my mom's ex's.
She was a real bitch, but a dynamite pastry chef.
At least there was something you liked about her.
I made it for you.
It's sort of a peace offering.
You want peace, Eden?
It's going to take a lot more than a fruitcake after what you've done.
You have every reason to hate me, Julia.
My being with Sean was inexcusable.
Some sort of acting out, I guess.
I really should be back in therapy.
My anger towards you--
I feel terrible about the way I've behaved.
Look...
you love my mom,
my mom loves you.
I've never had a real family.
Maybe this could be one.
I used to love fruitcake when I was a girl.
It's so fattening.
One bite won't hurt.
What are you doing for Christmas?
Nothing really.
I may just go to the movies or something.
I know mom's going to be with you.
It's ok.
Why don't you join us?
That's really kind of you, Julia,
but I don't think Sean would appreciate my being there.
I don't know. You know, it might help him.
Forgive and move on.
I'd love to come.
It's delicious.
This is what I rember about fruitcake--
once you start, it's hard to stop.
Well, I'll save the rest for later.
You can have it whenever you want.
Mom doesn't really like it anyway, so...
It's all yours.
Just a few more steps, mr. McNamara.
- Are all israeli women this-- - Pushy? Yes. It's genetic.
At ease, soldier.
So how long did you train for?
Not long. Women are not really expected to fight.
Thank God.
Didn't you want to defend your country?
What I wanted was to find a husband.
All those handsome, hard bodies in uniform,
tanned and sex-starved from the desert.
So after the army you went to university to study psychology.
No. To find a husband.
Hey, Mattie.
- Is this a bad time? - We were just finishing.
Rest up. Tomorrow we're going to do twice around the floor.
No, Rachel. Stay, please.
Guys, this is Rachel Ben-Natan, my counselor and torturer.
This is my mother Julia McNamara and one of my fathers Christian Troy.
Mattie has 2 daddies. Nice to meet you.
- How nice for you. - Yeah, it's big fun.
I-- we've been to see Kimber.
How's Jenna? Is she all right?
Kimber wants to keep Jenna, Matt.
I just need sometime with her to talk, show her I've changed.
Apparently she's filing for divorce, she's getting married
to Ram, and they have a pretty good case against you ever getting custody.
No, I'm gonna fight for her. She belongs with me.
Do you really think that you're capable
of taking care of a child?
She can't wait for you to grow up.
First dad and now you. Anyone else wants to throw in the towel?
Oh, Mattie, come on. Do you really think that any judge
in his right mind would give you custody?
Seriously!
What is the Matter with you people? Matt, listen to me.
You want your child back?
Either find a way or make a way.
And stop looking to your parents to rescue you.
I'll be right back.
Are you ok?
Oh, yeah yeah. Really.
Just-- feeling a little low and
overwhelmed with everything that's been going on.
- Excuse me, miss. - I'm not going to apologize.
I meant every word I said.
- Was that tough love? - Honesty. Try it.
Look, I'm a plastic surgeon.
I know you don't make much as a burn counselor.
I'd be happy to offer my services for free.
Why? Is there something you think I should have done?
Well, since honesty is the word of the day,
I could do a series of skin grafts, I could restructure your bone line.
You could make me beautiful again.
Thank you, doctor, but no.
You might find this hard to believe, but
I'm quite happy as I am.
- A martyr? - A survivor.
A living example of what people can go through and survive.
Are you all right?
- Yeah. - You look a little pale.
I'm probably getting a bug that's going around or something.
Here they are. I can't believe I found them.
What's going on?
What? Oh, nothing. I must have gotten up too quickly.
Oh, those pictures are freshman year!
Christmas Eve before and after the tree caught on fire.
You guys go ahead and laugh.
You didn't suffer property damage, right?
Those "Penthouse" magazines were vintage. Irreplaceable.
Ok, thank you.
Hello.
Well, we were just going to do our secret santa thing.
Ok, well, I could meet you later.
Ok. Yeah.
You too. Bye.
Ah, that was Olivia. We're having dinner later.
- I see you got your phone back. - What?
Oh, yeah. God, I've been leaving things all over the place lately.
So, who's going to go first?
I will.
Although I don't know if we can top last year's
"I love my dick" picture frame.
That was good, huh?
Thank you, Santa.
Green paper, my favourite.
"McNamara/Troy. Put your tits in our hands".
I thought that worked for 80% of our clients.
Doesn't get better than that, does it?
My turn.
Mmm... edible undies. Hilarious.
Dessert for Olivia.
Very funny.
I have another one.
Hey, you're not supposed to go over, rember?
- You know... - Make us look cheap.
Oh, they're beautiful.
It's not like they're expensive or anything.
It's just-- I don't know, I saw them,
I thought they'd look good on her, and
I got them.
I thought they'd look good with your eyes.
Thank you, Christian. You shouldn't have.
You guys are screwing each other.
Sean, I just bought her some earrings.
The phone, the touching...
Am I stupid?
Nobody's stupid. You shouldn't--
What? Take it personally?
Let it bother me.
She's not my wife anymore, who gives a shit?
- How long? - Sean, I'm sorry.
It just happened.
When were you gonna tell me?
Christmas day?
New years?
Or did you just want me to catch you in the act
when I came home early by mistake?
You were there that day.
When the phone--
What did you do, hide under the bed?
In the closet.
- Jesus. - Sean, you know,
I am sorry and we wanted to tell you, but--
Well, I just wanted to wait 'till after the holidays.
Right. Right.
Were you gonna sit me and Oli down and give us the good news
- at the same time? - What the hell is the difference?
I mean, seriously.
Look, I know it's difficult, but you're not together now anyway.
- It's not like we're cheating on you. - You're such a clueless piece of shit!
We love each other, Sean.
You left early this morning.
I didn't figure there was any point in staying in bed if I wasn't sleeping.
I'll say one thing for leaving the house before 5:00.
There's no traffic.
Look, we've been through enough over the years to split us apart and then some.
But somehow, we always end up back together.
I can't imagine anything in the world that could change that except
maybe Julia. So,
I won't see her if it means that much to you.
Oh, come on. It's not like you're Mr. Celibate
pining away waiting for her.
Why didn't you just go to New York and sleep with her there?
Or did you have to follow me out here and do it under my nose
because that's the only way you can really get off?
We're not doing it to cause you any pain, all right?
We're doing it to see if finally it feels right.
But...
I won't do it without your blessing.
I don't know if I can give it to you.
Give you my blessing.
I just don't know.
It looks good, doc.
Now I can look at my face without seeing that kid, the gun.
Well, Santa you're a better man than I am.
Then you must be one hell of a scumbag.
Excuse me. I'm in a private consultation with a patient.
Go on. Tell him.
Don't be afraid. Just say it.
I'm sorry, daddy.
I'm sorry I shot you.
You did it, honey.
You turned the other cheek.
Honey, go wait in the lobby. I'll be out in a second.
Your son is the one who shot you?
It's a long story, doc.
- How did you find me, Nancy? - I followed the money,
like I always do.
I went to get back payment from the court account,
and they said that
some ex-partymotion had been granted for some emergency surgery?
It's not your money, Duke.
It's his!
You should have been straight with us before the surgery.
I want you out now.
Come on, man. The little bastard shoots me
ad she comes fter me for child support?
I am still waiting for that apology, Duke.
"I'm sorry, son,
for abandoning you,
for giving up on you,
for pretending like you don't even exist!"
Not now, go away!
You put that gun in his hand and you cocked it.
All he had to do was pull the trigger.
Like this.
You need a hand with that?
No. I have 2 good ones of my own.
I came to ask you to come home.
Spend Christmas with your family.
Thanks.
It's ok. I made plans.
You know, when my dad left,
I thought I knew how to deal with it.
He wrote me off, I'd write him off son of a bitch.
I thought I had it pretty under control.
The hurt, the loneliness,
the anger.
I'm just replaying it
by doing to you what he did to me.
- Look, dad, I don't hold it-- - He couldn't help it.
He couldn't be different with me because of how his father was with him.
We're just passing the same shit on and on and on.
And I just want it-- I want it to stop.
Here.
What's this?
Something he left me
before he left me.
He said it was a box for me to put my dreams in.
I just figured it was useless.
The only dream I had was seeing him again.
But I have another one.
For you to forgive me.
I don't want to give up on you, man.
I don't want you to give up on me.
You keep this.
This is for your dreams.
I've got to find my own.
All I know right now is that
I'm never gonna be a man or a decent father
until I stop being your child.
I'd still love for you to spend Christmas with me.
With us.
Be around people who love you.
I'm spending it with Rachel.
If I can't be with Jenna on Christmas,
I figure spending it with Rachel and her kids
might take the sting out a little, you know?
- She's got kids? - 24 of them.
All in the pediatric burn unit.
It's good seeing you, dad.
Merry Christmas.
I'm glad you reconsidered.
- Matt coming? - No. Maybe next Christmas.
Ok. Now, do you feel like a holiday Martini?
It's like an everyday Martini just with a lot more vodka.
Hey, thank you for coming.
It wouldn't be the same without you.
I know how hard this must be for you.
Not being here would be even harder.
Here we go.
Cheers.
_/Yellow Sub\_ contact@yellowsubteam.com
Merry Christmas!